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How to win the battle between ambition and contentment

How to Win the Battle Between “Ambition” and “Contentment”

June 25, 2014 By Chip Valutis

(Emotional Connection) “What’s next?” “Hurry up!” “Get to the point.” “Let’s go!” “What are we waiting for?” Have you uttered these expressions recently? If you’re like many leaders I coach – I bet you have. In my practice, I deal with the classic “Type A” personality all the time. I love their passion and I have no doubt this drive, ambition and intensity helps them succeed. But let’s be honest – whether you will admit it or not – it comes at a cost. That cost is Contentment. As a driven individual – you are rarely satisfied or content. There is always something else to do. You don’t often “experience the moment” or “wallow in victory.”  Instead, it’s “On to the next battle!”

Ever wish you could stop the rollercoaster and just breathe?

(How it relates to reader) You can’t work at Mach 1 with your hair on fire forever and expect to be at your best. You need some moments to breathe, think and enjoy. These are what make life/work worthwhile. Think of your golf game – you can have a terrible round, but just one great drive has the power to bring you back again (regardless of all the missed putts!). These are the moments you file away. They are the moments that last beyond the daily fire fighting. They support your reason for being.

They are Perfect Moments.

Perfect moments are just that – snapshots of time where everything is “right.” They don’t have to be spectacular – they can be simple. A sound, a sight, an experience. I’m sure you’ve had some, although you may not of thought of them as such. Think back – can you think of a perfect moment you experienced in the last several months? Have you had one? Would you like to have them more often? Try these ideas and see if you can increase the Perfect Moments in your day: (My prescription)

  1. Be Aware: Too often we are so caught up in the battle that we loose sight of the overall experience. Head down and charging forward is not how you experience a perfect moment. Take a higher perspective; experience the whole and not just one or two parts. Look around and observe more than the task.
  2. Search for Good:  Too often our jobs have us in a half empty mindset – “What could go wrong?” “What did go wrong?” “What haven’t we thought of?” Find the positive; find the good. A beautiful cloud, a successful meeting, a promising employee, a perfect cup of coffee – I don’t care what it is, but turn your focus to the good and experience it.
  3. Build White Space in your Calendar:  It is virtually impossible to experience a perfect moment if you are 10 minutes late all day long. Build time in your day. Not hours – minutes can do the trick. Stop. Think. Experience. Feel. I promise you will find perfect moments if you can do this more regularly.
  4. Prioritize it:  If you are like me, you have more work than you can finish on any given day. As such, my priorities get done and the rest slips to tomorrow. I started to prioritize Perfect Moments. It is my goal to experience at least one a day. While I don’t always hit it – it is on my list. I challenge you to do the same.

(Emotional CTA) Of all the work I do as a psychologist and an executive coach, helping individuals learn to capture Perfect Moments is one of my favorite activities. It gives you a gift that continues to give throughout your Deliberate Journey.  It’s priceless.

Filed Under: Insights, Techniques, Tools & Tips

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About Chip Valutis

About Chip

As a Psychologist working in industry, I have heard and seen it all.

I’ve worked with Fortune 500 Companies as well as smaller, entrepreneurial enterprises. I coach CEOs and first time leaders. I develop new leadership teams and/or help teams who have lost their effectiveness. I work at an organizational level addressing complex systemic challenges and at an individual level helping leaders learn to lead.

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